"Funkatron, you jes sit yo'self down,"

because Pappy was from the Bayou, you see,

"an I'm'a gonna tell you a story 'bout a man from these parts. Now everybody knows 'bout Swampy Jake."

Pappy had a million Swampy Jake stories.

".. but what you as don't know is that Swampy Jake's mama, well she was a fine lady, real fine, but son, you listen real hard, because hain't hardly nobody what knows it, but Swampy Jake's mama, well, doncha know it but that she was an alligator."

And he'd sit back in his rocking chair, and light his pipe, and I'd feel the Bayou wisdom rolling over me.

"Pappy," I'd say, and he'd blow a smoke ring, "Pappy, you're full of shit."